Friday, April 15, 2011

Entry #37 - Spinster on the Googs

Dear Diary,
The magic of the Internet provides me with all kinds of fun and fanciful information. Here on the old Blogger, for instance, I have access to the "stats" page. The "stats" page, in case you didn't know, is where the Internet elves magically keep track of all the interesting statistical information that pertains to this blog.  Here are some of the things the elves have discovered for me recently...
This week people in 10 different countries looked at this blog, including 1 person in Peru, 2 people in India, and 2 people in Finland. I'm pretty sure there was actually only 1 person from India and 1 from Finland, and the second viewing was to show their respective Finnish and Peruvian friends how weird Canadian women are.

The most popular posts so far have been "Spinster Abroad" (parts 1 & 2), followed closely by "Bachelor Uncle Sojourn". I am not a statistician, but I'm pretty sure this proves a few things:
- I am far more interesting when drinking mojitos.
- Making fun of ugly swimwear never goes out of style.
- Muumuus ARE hilarious.
- Heather and Vanessa are both lovely, classy ladies who both draw a much larger audience than I do.
- My brother is a charming, dapper, and handsome fellow who draws a much larger audience than I do.

I have 31 followers and I would hug each and every one of them if I could.

Since it was created on Christmas day 2010, this blog has been viewed 7,860 times. At least half of those are my mom, 3 are my ex-boyfriends' current girlfriends making fun of me (and justifiably so, considering I refer to them all collectively as "Poor Man's Hannahs"), and at least 1000 are me banging at the computer like an angry monkey --> "WHAT!??? WHY IS THE FONT BLACK?!? NO ONE CAN READ THAT! BLARGH!!!!"

My mom is my biggest fan and comments on every entry without me asking her to, which I think lends a certain authenticity to my spinsterhood claim.

Perhaps the greatest find ever, though, is the "keyword search" seen in the above screenshot. The Internet elves keep track, you see, (with tiny clipboards) of exactly what people searched in google that resulted with them viewing this blog. Long story short, someone somewhere in the world searched "Spinster Vintage Porn" and ended up on this blog. This is perhaps the first time I have been  baffled, mildly disgusted, and proud all at the same time. Call me, Spinster Vintage Porn Surfer, Call me.


  1. Vintage porn rocks, if I wrote the blog it would be Vintage corn. This was great Hannah, I feel so informed!!!!!!

  2. Oh How I love you dear sister. You are truly magnificent. And i'm only charming after years of grooming from all the lovely ladies in my life.

  3. Also worth mentioning, I thought "spinster on the googs" was an entry all about our family. this is how often i'm used to our name being mispronounced. Amazing.

  4. I think I was the Spinster Liz Lemon! :) I had read your entry about 30 Rock and wanted to find it again quickly to reference something... My sister-in-law (who refers to herself as a Spinster Aunt [I have an adorable 1 year old son!] and was sad to learn you beat her to the blogging front of this up-and-coming demographic, but delighted that you do it so well) turned me onto your blog and we both love it and often text/Facebook each other when you post something new! :)