Diary of a Spinster Aunt - Entry #21
Even though I have lived here at Spinster Mansion since September, I have yet to use the laundry facilities provided within the building. As a matter of fact, I avoid the "Murder Basement" like men have avoided committing to me, with a steadfastness you can't help but admire begrudgingly. I have been down there only one time in four months, and that was to drop off our rent money through the random slot in the unmarked door in the corner. The Murder Basement is as scary as it sounds, including steep neck-breaking stairs, bare bulbs with pull strings, uneven cement floors with pipes coming out, random stacks of paint cans (because according to our landlord Wally, paint fixes EVERYTHING), an unnecessary number of unlit corridors with sharp corners, and a door to the outside that is padlocked closed. Every time Kim goes down there, she prefaces her departure with "If I'm not back in ten minutes, call the police". If all these things aren't enough to make someone want to avoid going down there, there is also the fact that there is only one washer and one dryer for 14 apartments, so you often can't even use the machine or you have to touch someone else's laundry in order to free one up (sick). That being said, it is not fair to constantly drag my laundry to my friends' homes, thus, in 2011 I shall get a roll of loonies and a roll of quarters and I shall venture forth, down into the pit of despair, and do my laundry like a normal spinster.